Saturday, August 4, 2012

August 3rd, 2012

Woke up early today, waited until he left.  I tried to get out of the house before he came home but he came home early as well.  He asked me if i was going to the store,,, if i needed too.  I told him I didn't NEED too, I have too to get away from him, meaning to make sure I don't keep hurting him.  This started a chain of conversations.

He talked to a dear friend of mine the other day.  He told me she said he was to fight for his military retirement fund and the house.. i was fuming inside but try to keep as cool as i could.  Didn't work.  He also said she said I did treat him like shit for a long time.  This befuddled me.. yes befuddled....cuz i know her and even though she is both our friend, she does lean more to me.  I couldn't for the life of me wonder why she would say something like that. She called me around midnight and come to find out.  He was just talking crap cuz she said she would never say anything like that.. retirement fund, house is our business, not hers.  She did ask him if it had anything to do with another woman and he said no.  I believe him.

Anyways, it did get kinda ugly.  It sort of ended up where .. "ok so you want a war with this divorce".  I had enough.  I gave him the number to cancel one of our insurance cuz it had collected over 2k in funds.  I told him to call and cancel it and there is our war divorce money.  As we continue to talk.. some "voice" in my head told me to calm down.  Give into him but stay quiet and prepare yourself for YOUR own future.  I broke down and gave him a hug. 

I told him I will do everything in my power to make him love me again.  He asked what if he couldn't,, how long will it take for me.  I told him I will go down that road until we are both fixed.


i'm back.  Had to stop typing cuz he was coming in this room.

I got some helpful advice from my friend.  I will just play this out and tread lightly with him and see if i can possibly win him over.  Thats about all I can do at this point.....

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