Sunday, August 26, 2012

August 18, 2012

Well, haven't posted in a few days because things are starting to get back to normal.  I just frustrates me how he put me through this crap.  It sucks to be so down, sad and depressed.

I'm not sure if I had mentioned this but during one of our 'fights', he threw the 'baby' card at me.  We have been together for 20yrs and never was lucky enough to have a baby of our own.  Not sure exactly who's fault this is.  Might be the timing, might be God saying not yet or we both might be broken.  I do know that I will take a small part of the fault for not having my diabetes control.  But, seriously, is that the real reason.  I look at some of these people with kids....some are WAY WAY fatter then i am.  Some are drug addicts, some are too young to even have kids and raise them.. then there is that group of people that just makes me go postal... the child abusers.  The ones you see on the news where they abuse their kids to the point of hospitalize or even death.  Every time I read  one of these or see it on the news, I'm always asking God.."why them and not me".

I know him and I will make great parents.  I still believe in the old school style of discipline.  None of this 'time out' crap. My punishments where spanking, kneeling and facing the wall.

(didn't realize i didn't published this) o.O

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